My son is 15 months old and it is really hard for me to get him to sleep. He refuses to sleep in his crib so I let him sleep with me in my bed but he still screams really loud when I put him to bed.
I don’t know if I should lay down with him in the bed until he falls asleep or if I should just let him put himself to sleep and keep putting him back to bed when he gets up and let him cry until he falls asleep.
I don’t know what kind of schedule I can use to help me get him to sleep easier.
by Jennifer
Baby Helpline:
Tips For 15 Month Baby That Wont Sleep
Your adorable son seems to be giving you quite a hard time in the evenings right now – not unusual in his age!
Depending on who you ask, I’m sure some people will recommend some sort of cry-it-out method. I don’t.
Instead I have a few other tips to improve the situation:
- First of all, review his whole sleep situation. Can it be, by any chance that he is not tired enough or too tired when you put him to bed? Check a tentative sleep schedule here. Also remember that children (and adults) that have enough stimulation, fresh air, and exercise during daytime often sleep better at night.
- After you’ve done any adjustments you may need to, you should have a tired, but not a too tired boy when it is time to go to bed. Then look over your routines around bedtime. Can you try to make the half-hour before going to bed a cozy one? Maybe cuddle up on the sofa or in your bed. Sing songs or read books if he is interested or watch TV together. Some babies sleep very well after a bath.
- Then when you see signs of him being tired, carry him to your bed, while gently playing with him to make him laugh a bit. If he starts crying, continue to play with him in your bed, until he stops crying. Then do whatever makes him interested in lying down with you. Some children become very relaxed if patted on their heads. Stay with him until he falls asleep and then put him in his crib.
- Once you’ve found a bedtime and evening routine that works better, stick to it!
- When he has started to accept being put to sleep with you without screaming, you can consider the next step – moving him to his crib while awake. For this to work, he probably has to be very tired, almost asleep in the beginning. Do your usual routines in your bed, then lift him to his own while still awake. Continue with whatever makes him calm in the crib. If he doesn’t accept it, take him up and redo the process until he falls asleep in his bed. Within in days, he will probably accept to be put in his own bed a bit faster.
To introduce new routines this soft way takes time. But I prefer trying to understand why the child protests and try to alter the situation. That doesn’t mean that a baby can decide what’s best for him or her, but that he may have important information that we should try to understand.
Maybe your son simply isn’t tired enough? Or too tired? Maybe the whole situation of putting him to bed has become a power-struggle and he senses your irritation?
I know you’re in a tough situation, but if you think that “within a month, things will improve” and start to alter your routines, it will be easier to cope – I promise!
If he continues to refuse the crib, then within a few months, you could consider a safe toddler bed or even a thick mattress on the floor for him if you don’t want to co-sleep.
I really wish you good luck!
Paula
More Toddlers That Won’t Sleep
- Screaming Toddler In The Middle Of The Night
- Why Isn’t My 18 Months Old Sleeping Through The Night?
- 18 Months Old Won’t Go To Sleep Alone
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Paula Dennholt founded Easy Baby Life in 2006 and has been a passionate parenting and pregnancy writer since then. Her parenting approach and writing are based on studies in cognitive-behavioral models and therapy for children and her experience as a mother and stepmother. Life as a parent has convinced her of how crucial it is to put relationships before rules. She strongly believes in positive parenting and a science-based approach.
Paula cooperates with a team of pediatricians who assist in reviewing and writing articles.
Please help! My 19 month old recently stopped sleeping on his own. We have a solid bedtime routine and he used to fall asleep in his crib on his own and sleep through the night, now he won’t do either. He wakes up several times a night and stays awake for a while. I usually have to sit in there for 30 minutes holding his hand to get him to sleep, only to have him wake up 30 minutes later and do it all over again. Please help!