Screaming Toddler In The Middle Of The Night

About

Contact

Newsletter

What's New

BabyTube!

Pregnancy

Childbirth

Baby care

For mom

For dad

Screaming Toddler In The Middle Of The Night

by Pamela
(New Albany, IN, USA)

My daughter will be 3 in March and for the last week she has woke up every night between midnight and 4am screaming as loud as she can.

A few nights when I go get her, she screams that she wants to watch the Doodlebops. Other nights she screams she wants to go outside and play. She screams non-stop for a good hour and NOTHING will calm her down.

What can I do?

She has been on a strict routine since she came home from the hospital, so nothing has changed about her daily lifestyle. She goes to bed every night between 8 and 9pm and she still takes a 2-3hr nap every afternoon.

She also talks/walks in her sleep if that makes any difference.

Comments for
Screaming Toddler In The Middle Of The Night

Click here to add your own comments

Dec 01, 2008

Night time screaming
by: Baby Help Line - Annie

Hi Pamela,

Sounds like an exhausting time for you! It is really hard to know what is going on in the minds of our tiny children. Sleep time is the time we process all the events of the day, the time we connect back into our inner wisdom, and dreaming is a really important part of that process. It sounds like your daughter is working pretty hard at night!

It's difficult for me to say what might be underlying it all, and it sounds like you have good routines in place for bedtime etc. Sleep talking and walking are all a part of her brain not quite having the boundaries in place that we
normally do when going to sleep. So it is giving her body messages to partly act out what is happening in her dreams, ie talking, walking somewhere. Apart from keeping her safe - barriers over stairs and locks on the doors for example
- it is not something to be unduly worried about. She may grow out of it, although some adults still sleepwalk!

Regarding the screaming, since her sleeping is so chaotic, when she wakes she is probably trying to gain some power and control. This is actually a good thing however, as a parent you obviously don't want her watching TV or playing outside at night. Nor do you want to have to keep getting up to her.

Talk to her during the day and get her agreement to learn a new way of sleeping. Including her in the process teaches her she can learn self control. Have her choose a power toy that will help her sleep the whole night (it might be a doodlebop if they have toy versions!). Together, come up with a little ritual she and the power toy can do in the night to put her back to sleep. You might be surprised what she comes up with. Giving her a torch can be a useful power tool!

Have a reward system so she gets a gold star, or doodlebug sticker on a chart for every night she puts herself back to sleep. After a week she can
earn something bigger. Expect setbacks, she won't master it all at once. When you do have to go in to her, use the power toy to ask "how would Deedee help you go back to sleep?".

Enjoy your time with her, she will grow out of the night time screaming and you will get a proper night's sleep again!

Annie Desantis

X Close Editor

Dec 01, 2008
Rating

Submitted by: Baby Help Line - Annie

Title

Comment
Hi Pamela, Sounds like an exhausting time for you! It is really hard to know what is going on in the minds of our tiny children. Sleep time is the time we process all the events of the day, the time we connect back into our inner wisdom, and dreaming is a really important part of that process. It sounds like your daughter is working pretty hard at night! It's difficult for me to say what might be underlying it all, and it sounds like you have good routines in place for bedtime etc. Sleep talking and walking are all a part of her brain not quite having the boundaries in place that we normally do when going to sleep. So it is giving her body messages to partly act out what is happening in her dreams, ie talking, walking somewhere. Apart from keeping her safe - barriers over stairs and locks on the doors for example - it is not something to be unduly worried about. She may grow out of it, although some adults still sleepwalk! Regarding the screaming, since her sleeping is so chaotic, when she wakes she is probably trying to gain some power and control. This is actually a good thing however, as a parent you obviously don't want her watching TV or playing outside at night. Nor do you want to have to keep getting up to her. Talk to her during the day and get her agreement to learn a new way of sleeping. Including her in the process teaches her she can learn self control. Have her choose a power toy that will help her sleep the whole night (it might be a doodlebop if they have toy versions!). Together, come up with a little ritual she and the power toy can do in the night to put her back to sleep. You might be surprised what she comes up with. Giving her a torch can be a useful power tool! Have a reward system so she gets a gold star, or doodlebug sticker on a chart for every night she puts herself back to sleep. After a week she can earn something bigger. Expect setbacks, she won't master it all at once. When you do have to go in to her, use the power toy to ask "how would Deedee help you go back to sleep?". Enjoy your time with her, she will grow out of the night time screaming and you will get a proper night's sleep again! <a href="http://www.easybabylife.com/annie-desantis.html">Annie Desantis</a>

Cancel Delete Delete & Ban

throbber Updating Comments page...

Dec 11, 2008

midnight screaming
by: Anonymous

My daugther is 3 and half years old and wakes up and screams in the middle of the night almost daily. Nothing seems to calm her down... I'm an inch short of throwing her in a cold shower... I know it won´t calm her but I do hope it makes her tired...

Anyway, the way she screams now, I don't think she can scream any harder while on the shower...

I don't think this power toy thing can help us. During daytime she talks about how she is the mother of a little girl who misbehaves and cries all night... We are worried, and also sick and tired of our daily night show, me especially cause I'm the father, and she yells at me, orders me to leave her room while screaming for mommy.

Dec 24, 2008

Screaming Toddler In The Middle Of The Night
by: Anonymous

I am going through the exact same thing with my 3 1/2 year old. He wakes up screaming at the top of his lungs for no reason at all other than his glass of water isn't cold enough or the blankets are all worng or he wants to go and play.

I sit there for an hour listening to this and trying to talk to him and nothig works and then he just stops, says sorry and goes back to sleep.

Jun 02, 2009

same deal
by: maryj

my 3.5 yr old will wake up usually after a bout 2 hours of sleep screaming and shaking....her eyes wide open she will not tell me what is wrong she wont tell me what she wants or needs she just screams with her eyes buggen out its like she is inna scared panic : ( it worries me alot i wonder is it a bad dream or did she sleep on her arm wrong and it fell asleep or what idk : (....i try to hold her and rock her back to sleep but sometimes she wants to smack and hit me

Jun 04, 2009

Night Terrors?
by: Baby Help Line - Annie

Hi again,

Another possibility is night terrors, which are quite common in 2 - 6 year olds. Children usually grow out of them by aged 8. Night terrors are different from nightmares, in that the child may appear awake, but is not rational, may scream or be frightened but not be consolable. Children don't usually have much recollection of the event the next day except for your disapproval at being woken!

Children with night terrors, often don't recognize their parents, or demand unreasonable or unusual things - like needing to go outside.

There is evidence that children who are not getting enough sleep or if there has been major event in the family (a death, a birth, divorce, moving house etc) are more prone to Night Terrors.

There is no point in trying to wake them or discipline them, just be patient and try to re-assure the child until it is over. For children who have nightly (or more than one!) Terrors, some parents find if they wake the child 15 minutes before it usually happens and keep them awake for a short time, then it can interrupt the pattern.

Good luck, parenting can sometimes be exhausting! But they do grow out of it eventually!
Annie Desantis

Jul 13, 2009

breaks my heart
by: Anonymous

My little boy(nearly 2) sometimes wakes up screaming and there is nothing me or his father can do about it!He throws his teddy,dummy and anything he can get his hands on! He bites,slaps and pushes anyone who tries to comfort him! We just have to sit and wait for him to calm down(obviously making sure he doesnt hurt himself!) and as a mother who suffered from really bad nightmares and sleep walking as a child(to the point of seeing a child therapist for it!) it breaks my heart that for the 10/15 minutes it takes him to calm down! When he calms down we usually have a cuddle and he falls straight back to sleep!I can totally get what the lady was saying about the child not recognising the parent because my little boy looks right through me and he is such a mommys boy during the day i cant believe that if he wasnt upset he wouldnt want me to comfort him!
Dont get me wrong he is a lovely boy and this doesnt happen all the time! He has always been a off again on again sleeper so we are used to broken noghts sleep!
So good luck i hope it settles down soon!

Aug 24, 2009

Toddler Wakes Up Crying and Hitting
by: Bob Loblaw

I'm thinking (hoping) my 2 year old is only suffering night terrors too. He sleeps with us and normally sleeps like a rock. Very often, however, he will wake up screaming and crying and is inconsolable. When we try to talk to him or touch him he just screams louder and hits us. Recently, the hitting has come even though we aren't saying ot doing anything. He just wakes up and starts repeatedly slapping his mom or I. The other day, he did this out of nowhere and then went into the bathroom and stood in a corner. I continued to pretend I was asleep and figured he'd come to bed. All of a sudden, he walked back in the room and began spitting at me. All with no provocation. The only thing that seems to break the spell is to sing the Dora the Explorer theme song. This eventually gets through, calms him down, and lulls him back to sleep.

If it helps at all, he's always been very active in his sleep. Even as a baby, he would "sleep crawl" into his crib rails, banging his head repeatedly but not waking up. Once he learned to talk, he began talking and laughing in his sleep. DOes anyone know if these other behaviours: hitting, spitting, and getting out of bed are related to night terrors as well?

Sep 21, 2009

3.5 yr old girl night terror+ shaking/shivering
by: Scared Dad

My 3.5 year old daughter just woke up shaking,crying, and chattering her teeth, and talking about needing to go into space and other strange gibberish. it scared the hell out of me. she eventually started responding to me,insisting nothing was wrong, and that she didn't eat or drink anything strange but she was still shaking at this point. is this a night terror, or what?