My son is nine months old and spends much of his time screaming, sometimes this is accompanied by crying but not always, when I say screaming I mean it’s really. really loud.
Other mothers have started commenting that they have never heard a baby so loud or who screams so frequently. This has been going on for weeks, when he screams he never has a temperature, I offer food and drink and he wants neither nor does his nappy need changing. It is just short bursts of exceptionally loud screaming and it can continue on and off for hours.
It mainly seems to start if I put him in his stroller, cot, bed, highchair or sometimes the floor, or sometimes when I talk to someone else, but sometimes even when I am with him or carrying him or giving him sole attention he screams too.
He had a recent check up and he doesn’t have an ear ache, sore throat, or urinary infection. He has just cut his third and fourth teeth so I don’t think it’s teething either. I am really worried there is something wrong and I know people think that too.Baby Help Line:
Tips For Screaming 9-Month-Old Baby
You know what, it sounds to me as if your son is scared. At his age, his mind is developing and he is know realizing that he is his own person, separate from mom. For many babies, that is terrifying.
One of my children, my daughter, reacted in a similar way as you son. That she has a strong voice didn’t help. She screamed so load out of the blue (in my view) when we met some people or even at some voices, that I thought something really hurt her. (At four years old, she had a lovely singing voice, which wasn’t bad.)
9 months old really is at the peak of both separation anxiety and stranger anxiety for many children. (You can read about 9 month development and milestones here. ) They need very badly to be reassured that mom continues to be around, despite her actually having her own body, separate from theirs. It may sound like a joke, but for the children, this really is a trauma. Being put down, put in a crib or just left alone for a couple of minutes can be more than they can take.
Studies have shown that babies that are allowed to really be held and carried and have their needs for comfort met at this time actually grow out of their anxiety faster. So even if it is tough – and it is! – don’t be hard on your son. Don’t use any cry-it-out methods and don’t worry that he isn’t normal. He can probably sense that from you too, which doesn’t help as it makes him even more uncertain. Instead, carry your little screamer around, hug him, kiss him and tell him that you love him over and over again. And when he does show small signs of independence encourage him with a big smile.
Also make sure that you do not reinforce the screaming. As parents, it is so easy to grab a moment of peace whenever our children are happy and not looking for our attention, so we unconsciously reinforce more demanding behaviours by simply mainly attending to our children when there is something to correct. It is possible that your son has learnt that he will get a lot attention from you by screaming. To counter that learnt behaviour, make sure you give him lits of attention in a positive way when he is happy and calm. Play games, make him laugh, sing and let him “help out” by being around where you are.
Also don’t make a big fuss of his screaming. Don’t try to shut him up, just try to distract him instead. Make sure he is comfortable, not scared and with you and then do not react strongly to his screaming. Give him something interesting to look at or play with together with you instead. At 9 months, a baby can learn to imitate your movements if you do Itsy Bitsy Spider or some other song. They can even learn sign language. So there is a lot of fun to try out togehter.
And don’t bother what other people say! Having a strong voice is a good thing that will help him later in life. Whether he is scared, frustrated or is simply looking for attention or even just trying his voice, it all still a phase that will pass. It is great to try to figure out what triggers the screaming and then act mitigate this. I hope some of the thoughts above will help you find some ways to improve the situation.
He is simply growing up. And that can tough, as we all know
Take care, and don’t worry,
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