1 Year Old Still Breastfeeds

by Anonymous

My baby is one year old and she is still drinking my breast milk. I need to complete my education and I want to start working again. It is really hard to do all these things with me having to breastfeed her.

She has 5 teeth and I am worried that it is going to become hard for me breastfeeding as she grows more teeth. I want her to start sucking on a bottle and not want my breast anymore. She sucks on breast for so long and doesn’t let go even if she is full until she is deep asleep.

My mom wants to take her on a vacation for a month or 2, but we don't know how she will do without my breast milk.

My baby is also Lactose intolerant, she gets hives whenever she eats or drinks anything with milk in it. She eats some foods but not so much. She drinks ONLY 10ml of soy milk or lactose free milk.

My biggest mistake was that when she was about 3-4 months old I tried all types of milk formulas except soy. When she turned 9 month old someone suggested to me to try to feed her soy milk and I did. And I was "surprised" that she had no allergies with this milk, then I went and read all the ingredients to whichever she had allergies with and all those foods contained lactose and soy was lactose free and that is how I found out that she is lactose intolerant.

My baby doesn't even go to bed without me that is also one of my concerns. She is a sensitive sleeper, she wakes up if she hears even a tiny bit of noise and whenever I get up she gets up, I can't even go to the bathroom at night without her waking up with me.

I need your advice on how to get my baby to start living without me and drinking soy milk more than 10mls. I have tried all others flavors of soy milk (ex: chocolate, vanilla) PLEASE HELP ME!!!

Baby Help Line Response:


Dear Mom,

You seem have quite an exhausting time right now with your baby! I don’t know if you are a single mom or not, but since you don’t mention a dad anywhere in your letter, I’ll try to help you as if you are single. If dad is around, well you can help each other out with the tips I provide.
You baby seems to have some problems both with her eating and sleeping. (No wonder you're tired…) Actually I think these two issues just might be related. If you can help your baby to eat better during the day, it is possible that she will sleep better at night…

Now to the eating. Since your baby is 1 one year old, I would stop trying to make her drink more formula if I was you. You can continue to give it to her, but what she really needs to become full and get the nutrition she needs to be able to explore the world all day long is solid foods.

Check out this baby feeding schedule for some ideas on how to organize your baby’s eating.

It might take some time to get her into the habit of eating more solid food if she is not used to it, but the more she eats, the less breast milk (or formula) she will need. Give her finger foods – many one-year-olds really love feeding themselves. Give her food that she likes (as long as it is healthy) and let her eat together with the rest of the family. Don’t ever try to force her, though. You can offer formula or water along with the meals if you like and breastfeed her between meals or after the meals if she still seems hungry. (Not before the meals, since the idea is to make her full without your breast milk.)

Since you suspect that your baby is lactose intolerant, I think you should take her to a doctor, to confirm the intolerance and get some instructions on how to handle it.

Once your baby eats more solid foods, it will be much easier to wean her from breastfeeding and she might actually also sleep better.

Now to the sleeping: Your baby is obviously used to sleeping close to her beloved mom. Nothing at all wrong with that. But, if it prevents you from getting a good night’s sleep, you should of course try to change the situation.

Here are few things you can do (if you don’t already) to help your baby sleep in her own bed:

• Always have her sleep in her own bed during her daily naps (if you are at home, of course) as well as when she goes to bed at night. If she needs to be close to you to fall asleep, fine, but then lift her to her own bed. In the middle of the night just do whatever gives you the best possible sleep for the time being – probably take her to your bed when she wakes up the first time during the night.



• Introduce some kind of lovey (a safe stuffed animal or a soft small blanket). Always keep it close to your baby while she is falling asleep. Chances are she will eventually be able to cuddle with her lovey at night instead of needing your attention every time she wakes up. (YOU can sleep with it close to your body first a few nights, to make it smell Mom.)



• Move away from her slowly at night to gradually increase the space between her and you in bed. This way she will learn to sleep further away from you.



• When she doesn’t wake up as much anymore and is used to sleep in her own bed during daytime, you can start lifting her to her own bed at night also at night.
  
  
• Make sure she is not cold, when sleeping on her own. It is not at all as warm to sleep in her own bed as to co-sleep. A warm pyjamas or a sleep bag (like Grobag) is better than relying on a blanket, since most babies kick off their blankets within minutes. If she is too cold (or too warm), she is much more likely to wake up frequently.

I hope this helps as a start! Once your baby eats better and sleeps better on her own, it will be much easier for your mom or someone else to help you for longer periods.

(Although, personally I would not recommend that your 1-year-old is away from you for as long as 1 or 2 months. She is still very dependent on you to feel safe and loved. Start with your mom taking care of her during day time or for 1 or a couple of days. )

Oh, yes, I almost forgot... Some babies don’t let go of the breast even if they are asleep. Carefully and slowly put your finger in the corner of her mouth as soon as you notice that she has fallen asleep. Release the vacuum and take away your nipple.

And if she is not biting you now with 5 teeth, more teeth is not likely to be a problem either.

I think that was it! Good luck!
/Paula

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